The Touch That Moved Me – Five Scientific Revelations Regarding the Profound Benefit of Touch

Conference calls…ugh! Though worthwhile, they can be draining, especially after two full days of back-to-backs. I experienced this recently. Near the end of Day Two, I thought I might pull my hair out.

I had about 20 minutes before my final call. When I went to refill my water glass…are you kidding me?...I found the cooler empty. OK, it’ll only take a few to fill this five-gallon monster up, I reasoned, throwing the empty in the trunk and hauling it to the grocery store.

I made a beeline to the store’s self-fill cooler. I had begun filling when I felt a hand on my shoulder. Before I could turn, the hand stroked my arm, as gentle as a whisper. The underside of my fleece sweatshirt kissed my skin with the pressure.

I expected to see a familiar face but found a new one instead. He was shorter than me, which was surprising considering my 5’4” stature. It made sense when I noticed the large hump on his back. He didn’t look at me; in fact, his head cocked to the left while his neck turned his focus about 15 degrees to his right. His thick shock of hair haloed his face in a bowl cut. His expression held neither recognition nor malice. His face revealed neither laugh nor worry lines.

Just into his second stroke, a lady came whirling around the corner. “No, no, you’ve already greeted her,” she said. “Come on. You have shopping to do.” The man’s expression didn’t change. He didn’t acknowledge this woman whom, I presume, was his job coach. He just turned and shuffled away. The coach said, “Remember, you need to use your words,” as she followed behind.

While I watched, I realized that this was my first touch of the day. And it couldn’t have been more pure.

It moved me. It moved me.

For once, I was glad for the five-gallon fill time; I could use it pull my emotions together before heading to the check-out.

I saw him a minute later pushing his little cart with his ipad shopping list, his head positioned in its peculiar way. His eyes held no more awareness than a billboard.

He would never know the value of his gift. I would never be able to reach his spirit, much less his mind, and return the favor.

Have you thought lately about the power of touch? What does it do for our life balance? Does it benefit the sender of the receiver more, and does that even matter?

Touch is fundamental to human communication, bonding, and health. People can identify love, gratitude, and compassion through it, differentiating between those messages based on the touch itself. A scientist named Dacher Keltner proved it in a recent study:

“We built a barrier in our lab that separated two strangers.” One person stuck his/her arm through the barrier and waited. The other, given a list of emotions, had to try to convey each emotion through a one-second touch to the stranger’s forearm. The waiting person had to guess the emotion.

“Given the number of emotions being considered, the odds of guessing the right emotion by chance were about eight percent.” Remarkably, participants guessed compassion correctly nearly 60 percent of the time; they guessed gratitude, anger, love, and fear more than 50 percent.

Science reveals four additional points:

1)   Touch activates the brain’s orbitofrontal cortex, specifically the vagus nerve, which is linked to feelings of reward and compassion. It can trigger the release of oxytocin, also known as, “the love hormone.”

2)   Touch builds cooperative relationships. When psychologist Robert Kurzban had participants play the “prisoner’s dilemma” game, they could choose to cooperate with a partner or compete against him for a limited amount of money. An experimenter touched some of the participants as they began—just a quick pat on the back. Those participants were much more likely to join with their partner.

3)   Touch signals safety. In a study by Jim Coan and Richard Davidson, participants lying in an fMRI brain scanner anticipated a painful blast of white noise. They showed heightened brain activity in regions associated with threat and stress unless their romantic partner stroked their arm; these respondents didn’t show any reaction. It was as if touch had turned off the threat switch.

4)   Touch promotes trust and inclusion. A study by French psychologist Nicolas Gueguen revealed that students who received a friendly pat from their teacher were three times more likely to speak up in class. Another study found students receiving a hand pat from the librarian while checking out a book liked the library more and wanted to come back.

Could anything be simpler, yet more profound, than touch?

Whom might you bless with this gift, in its purest form?

Enjoy your day. Enjoy this blog.